![]() But how could it mean the same thing to the husband? In his state it could not mean the same. “Just give me a chance to change my shirt,” answered the husband, “and I’ll jump with you!” “Darling,” she said enthusiastically, “I hope you’ll forgive me but I must run tonight is my bridge night.” There his bookkeeper handed him a note informing him that all his insurance policies had lapsed.ĭisgusted, he took a cab home, walked slowly into the living room and was greeted cheerfully by his wife. Continuing to his office, he arrived at the factory just as the firemen were watering down the hot embers. Driving nervously down the highway in a new car on which five payments were due, he rammed into the compact car of one of his best customers and made a sardine can out of it. On the same day he was advised by mail that if he didn’t meet a heavy mortgage payment, his home would be seized. The businessman was told by his doctor that he had a heart condition. The meaning is not in the words, the meaning is in the mind that uses them. It was worded differently, true, but even if it had not been worded differently my answer would have been the same.Įven when we use the same words we don’t mean the same thing. “It seemed to me that Gramya’s question was practically the same as mine on Sunday…” No, neither practically the same nor theoretically the same, only worded differently. It must be addressed to a particular individual in a specific way – only then does it apply to you, otherwise not. The answer, to be meaningful, must be particular. Otherwise the question becomes general and then the answer is in the abstract, then it is not addressed to anybody. When I answer you, I answer you personally that’s why I insist that you write your names on the question. So never compare your questions with those of others. And you have a different mind and a different consciousness, a different character, a different past. So how can somebody else ask a question like you? How can you ask a question like somebody else? The wording, the language, the formulation of the question is not important at all it arises out of your consciousness, out of your mind. You are simply you, there is only one you there is nobody else like you. Everybody is so unique, everybody is so individual that never before has there been anybody like you never again will there be anybody like you. You can write a question in exactly the same way as Gramya and I will not answer it the same way. I am not answering the question I am answering the questioner – that must be understood. Even if you use exactly the same words, the question will be different and you will get a different answer from me. Nobody else can ask the question that you can ask. The first thing: you cannot ask a question that Gramya asks. Why have you become so hard on old disciples? Don't you love me anymore? I am with you whatever is the case. Excuse me for asking this, but I too mean to ask lovingly. But you answered her very lovingly and gently and me with a thousand-pound sledgehammer. So if you give in to your wife she will never forgive you, if you give in to your husband he will never forgive you, because your whole being will vibrate with antagonism.It seems to me that Gramya's question on Tuesday was practically the same as mine on Sunday, only worded differently. But harmony is missing from the very beginning. To 'give in' means that you are reluctant but still you are doing it – for harmony's sake. It is better to be defeated, it is better to be cursed than to give in. If you give in you are giving in against yourself. "'I am always giving in….' Then you are not in a let-go. If it goes south, good if it goes north, good if it does not go anywhere, good if it drowns you, good. You have to flow with the river wherever it leads. If the conflict brings misery then that has to be accepted. Whatsoever happens, there should be a total acceptance of it – both of the act and of the consequence. "To move on the path of Tao is to move relaxedly. If God wills the conflict to be there then it has to be that way. You would like to have no conflict but this liking is your ego. ![]() What can you do? The conflict has to be accepted with great respect. "'It is all jolly fine for everyone to do their thing but what should be an attitude when our 'things' conflict?' Let there be conflict. "So the first thing is that you are not to impose anything upon yourself otherwise you miss the path of Tao. ![]() When you relax and you do your thing – whatsoever it is, mind you, whatsoever, I say – then you are in harmony. "It is difficult because you immediately make ideals. If conflict is your thing and you allow it, then that is harmony for you – because you will be in harmony with your nature. It has nothing to do with harmony, it has to do with let-go. "If conflict is your thing then let it be so. ![]()
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